Looking for the Cause Unknown Rains Evenly: a poem By John McKinley Pride Jry
Sometimes when this darkness sets its claws deep within me,
love cannot find a way to fit itself
within this lifeless coffin I have become.
I lose all hope.
I lose all I once was.
I lose every sense to live.
When this darkness sets in deeply,
I come to realize I am withering away into this abyss of heaviness,
nothing to stop the fall of the sure end that perceives me.
I sometimes think happy thoughts to stop the fear of death that grows like the roots of a Ficus tree inside my twisted veins, which raises up the foundation of what once was a stable life I could call my own.
The thought of sunshine upon me and the smell of greenery, the laughter of children playing and old folks talking of their golden years, all brings a smile to my muted face and caresses me with color again.
Some how unwillingly, the darkness creeps back up into my heart from under the rock I smashed it with, bringing me back down to reality that my life has been smeared upon the pages of others lives.
The cause for my search is like rain that spreads evenly across infertile land, where nothing will cultivate but bleak spirits of madness that wallow in sadness, like ghosts that are lost without meaning in the poison that spreads through me.
My will brings back the light of hope that burns in me, the one true flame that burns like an antidote within my vary soul, the one truth that stays burning in me to never let it be doused by another of who I have become.
Even though this darkness may hold me, it can never keep me bound in its ugly grasp of mental decay which rains evenly across this land of the cause unknown.
By John McKinley Pride Jr
(This is for a new book that is coming out soon pleas stay tuned. This poem is about AIDS please tell me if you see the secret msg in the poem.)